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So Jesus said to them, "For a
little while longer the Light is among you. Walk
while you have the Light, so that darkness will not overtake you; he
who walks in the darkness does not know where he goes. While you have
the Light, believe in the Light, so that you may
become sons of Light." (John 12:35-36)
Just pondering these words and noticing
the three points highlighted here is so profound I want to just
absorb it without analysis for awhile. I sense that there is so much
about to explode into my heart and mind from this that I need to
adjust my thinking so as to be as open as possible and not prevent my
heart from catching anything the Holy Spirit may want to share with
me. (Selah)
What is even more fascinating is the
immediate context for these statements. These words of Jesus seem
almost disconnected from the questions directed at Him related to His
previous comments. On the surface at least, it appears that Jesus is
intentionally ignoring the doubting questions of those who
insistently seek to deny the truth about His divinity. That in itself
is a powerful lesson for me to learn.
So often I feel compelled to answer
people's questions directly. Yet I have learned – or should have
learned by now – that too often people's questions can be
temptations or manipulations to draw me into an endless argument
which has no outlet but darkness. I have become more aware as of late
of the vital importance of paying attention to the condition of the
spirit, both my own and that of those I am interacting with if I want
to keep my inner peace. There simply are too many potholes in which I
can receive injury and drop into shame needlessly by getting
entangled in quibbling over things that can be simply diversions to
pursuing a saving relationship with my Savior.
Many of these diversions are all too
familiar to me as many of them were the mainstream issues of debate
and teaching during my formative years. I now have so much to unlearn
from religion and so much to learn from Jesus that I simply cannot
afford to waste my time arguing about things that are clearly rooted
on fear rather than faith. That BS detector has proved extremely
useful for me for analyzing whether something is worth discussing or
whether it is a diversion to keep me preoccupied while my spirit is
being poisoned at the same time. If I sense that a person is
motivated primarily by fear and is seeking to impose that fear on me,
I immediately feel alerted to my need to seek a higher perspective
and be reminded of the many things I am being taught from God that
give me a completely new view of reality and my own identity in
Christ.
The people around Jesus wanted to draw
Him into a debate about popular beliefs about the Messiah. Their
misconceptions about what the Messiah was supposed to be like and
what he was supposed to do was the main reason that most people
rejected Jesus as being the right one to fulfill that role. The life
and teachings of Jesus were so radically out of sync with their
Scripture based opinions about their expected Messiah that most
simply could not see how He could be considered a viable candidate to
fulfill those prophecies. Many of them had read the Scriptures and
knew what they said, but their hearts had been so darkened by
religious assumptions that they refused to challenge, that they
simply could not reconcile the radical discrepancies between Jesus
and their expectations of a deliverer.
The more I have been learning about the
true character and nature of God the more I see that we are little if
any different today. Every system and version of religion that I know
of today carries similar baggage and prejudices as those that so
blinded the Jews of Jesus' day. And those prejudices so hardened
their hearts that at times Jesus simply turned away from even
discussing them as He did at this point in His conversation with
them. Rather than be drawn into arguing over the validity or accuracy
of their opinions about the Messiah, He simply dropped down to the
real issue that lay beneath the problem of their misunderstanding and
tried to speak to their hearts instead of just their head. He began
to warn them about the dangers of clinging to traditional
interpretations and prejudices instead of opening their minds and
hearts to view things in a completely new perspective as He had been
seeking to share with them for so long.
Interestingly I have found myself in a
similar situation just in the past few days. I got caught up in an
online discussion with a group of people who long to learn and share
much more about the emerging truths of God's character. I share that
same passion and so I was drawn into a discussion that emerged among
them via emails about a book that one of them had written. I have not
read much of that book yet, but what I have read seems to be
interesting at least and I intend to go further as I find the time.
However, in this discussion the
apparent leader of this think group began to try to discredit the
book and warn people that he believed it contained false information.
The tenor of his comments disturbed me and particularly because he
never presented any valid evidence of what he disagreed with in the
book. He simply inferred that there were points in the book that he
felt could not be substantiated and that his personal views about a
technical difference were the only views acceptable.
I hesitated at first to get involved,
but since I had initiated a relationship with this man a few months
ago and had become somewhat acquainted with him as a result, and also
because we have just finished an intensive study of Matthew 18 in our
church that lasted over three months in which it became clear how
Jesus wants us to resolve differences, I decided to take the risk and
send a private email to this man appealing for him to be a bit more
gracious and humble in the way he was writing about those with whom
he disagreed.
The response I received from him gave
me mixed feelings about what was going on in his mind and heart. But
I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and continued to read
with interest the intensifying debate between a number of his friends
about the book. One of them very helpfully condensed the opinions of
each person involved in the debate so at last I could figure out what
the real issues were in plain words. But when I saw what was being
contended it became more apparent that this leader seemed to have a
spirit of contention that was all too familiar to me from people in
my own past. I can all too readily recognize that spirit of
divisiveness and subtle pride cloaking itself as humility but that is
really religious arrogance. I am not saying this to judge anyone but
simply from observing that spirit in all too many people I have known
from my past.
The problem that immediately arises is
that I am all too vulnerable to having that same spirit myself. We
detect most readily in others the issues that are often unresolved in
our own hearts and I am keenly aware of that. How to approach someone
per the instructions of Jesus in Matthew 18 to seek resolution while
avoiding being triggered to reflect the same spirit requires a great
deal of prayer, humbling and intense communication with the Spirit of
God for a higher perspective and a right spirit beyond what comes
naturally. It is so easy to judge someone who is judging you or
others but it takes divine wisdom and close dependence on the Spirit
of Jesus to adopt a spirit that is humble enough to not become
triggered by the potential ignitions that may result from approaching
someone about their faults.
When it became evident in the email
discussions that this brother was unwilling to alter his tone and was
agitating others and creating distress, I reluctantly decided to try
one more time to appeal to him to reconsider his tone and spirit. I
had no interest in getting involved about the facts of the debate as
to whether they were true or not, but rather I wanted to point out
that the spirit in the hearts of those involved were far more
important than the accuracy of facts, as important as that can be.
This time I sent the email to all involved and prayed my way through
it with great trepidation seeking to humble myself as much as
possible while composing it.
What resulted was almost surprising.
Several people immediately responded with joy and relief and
appreciation which made me feel affirmed and encouraged. To my
amazement the one who had written the book and was under the most
attack responded by accepting all the blame for what the other
antagonist was doing as if he had been the one at fault. But sadly
the main person creating the tension reacted defensively again as he
had done each time previously. At that point I decided my input was
enough for a group of people I had never even met and felt it was
time to go back to observer status.
The next morning which happened to be
Sabbath during my meditations with God I collected a number of verses
that were emerging in my mind as personal encouragement for my own
heart. I had no intention or thought of sharing them with anyone
else, but as I finished I felt impressed to simply post them to this
group as a neutral offer of encouragement for any who might be open
to it.
What happened next greatly saddened me.
Instead of taking it at face value as simply a list of interesting
and potentially encouraging Scriptures, the leader who has been
defending himself insistently from the very beginning and blaming
everyone else for all the problems, sent me a return email strongly
suggesting that I am in great danger of being deceived by worldly
delusions involving meditation and other like issues popularly being
attacked by conservative critics today. I immediately sensed that I
was coming into the crosshairs of a potential avalanche of criticism
from a person who may likely indulge in this on a regular basis and
that the best way to deal with it was to not fuel the attack by any
response. I do not want to become defensive for I know that anything
I say will only be used to attack me further. I am all too familiar
with that technique by those who's spirit is reflective of the great
accuser of the brethren.
As I read this passage this morning I
felt God reaffirming this lesson for me, for Jesus had to deal with
critics constantly and is the perfect pattern of how to relate to
such people. Only the Holy Spirit from Jesus can give us the wisdom
and peace and keep us in the rest that God has for those who trust in
Him. I do not want to allow anyone to steal the growing peace that I
am enjoying in God, and those who insist on dwelling on a spirit of
fear and want to infect others with that debilitating spirit, I need
to avoid getting involved with whenever possible.
These words of Jesus are a warning and
admonition to my own heart in my present circumstances. He has been
reminding me lately that the many things He has been sharing with me
from the Word and other sources about His true nature and how He
relates to us are not just exciting pieces of cognitive information
to collect and share with others. These things must transform my own
heart and the way I relate to situations and people if I am to be
changed by them and not lose them. I must not just learn the
wonderful truth about God's character but I must allow that truth to
be worked out in my choices each day. I must walk in the light while
I am being blessed with increasing light before events in this world
make it much more difficult to see the light.
By choosing to walk, or act on the
light of emerging truth and seeking to open my heart to embrace and
believe at the deepest level these stunning revelations about God
that I have been learning, the result will be – according to Jesus'
own words – that I can become a son of the Light. I like that. I
find that encouraging and it inspires hope in my heart that He will
finish the work He is doing in me.
