I am currently delving into a deeper understanding of the true meaning of the cross of Christ, how it relates to salvation and how it reveals God's heart.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

What Do I See on My Sea?


The sea began to be stirred up because a strong wind was blowing. Then, when they had rowed about three or four miles, they saw Jesus walking on the sea and drawing near to the boat; and they were frightened. (John 6:18-19)

In Bible prophecy the sea is used to represent people. In this passage is a very clear illusion to the condition of the people involved in this story. Their emotions were clearly stirred up, initially by the excitement of seeing a mighty miracle of Jesus in their behalf, but then even more so by their frustration and anger at Jesus for not allowing them to force Him to become their earthly king.

In this story the sea not only represents the people themselves but the emotional consensus of the people. Their emotions were very decidedly stirred up. They had not gotten their way though they believed that their desires were in line with advancing the kingdom of God on earth. They felt that Jesus was blocking the will of God for their lives and for their national aspirations. They were sure that they understood prophecies of the Old Testament and they could not understand why Jesus seemed to always be going in a different direction from the religious people who had been trained all their lives in the Scriptures.

A strong wind was blowing alright. Their frustration and resentment added fuel to the intensity of the crowds emotions. Their comments to each other amplified their emotions and they fed off each other until the sentiments became so powerful that no one could stop the mass movement to force Jesus to become king. Things had gotten out of hand and reason was no longer possible. Jesus stepped in to diffuse the situation by simply absenting Himself from their presence after ordering the disciples to get into the boat and leave for the other side.

The sea was certainly getting stirred up alright. As the disciples separated themselves from the crowd very grudgingly, their opinions of Jesus at that point contained very little sympathy for His point of view. If He was truly the Messiah then why wouldn't He do what everyone knew the Messiah was supposed to do? What was His problem anyway? Didn't He get it? He had just blown one of the greatest opportunities anyone could have had to deliver the Jewish nation from the galling oppression of the Romans. His popularity as at an all-time high but He failed to see how He could have exploited it for the common good.

All of these thoughts and many more were swirling around in the minds of the disciples as they used some of their pent-up adrenaline to row the boat toward the other shore. The comments and mutterings going on in that boat were likely not very complimentary as they reviewed the confusing things that had just transpired. Unbelief filled their hearts and they were tempted to question if Jesus was even really the Messiah if He did things like what had just happened. The wonderful feelings they had experienced during the multiplication of the bread and fish had all but evaporated and now they found themselves swimming in doubt and negative thinking and depression.

In this condition they were wide open to an assault by the enemy. Their hearts were dwelling in darkness and negative suggestions were easily inserted into their minds. As a result the sea was getting very stirred up and there seemed to be little hope left. What was the point anyway? Why were they following this teacher if He refused to do for them what any self-respecting Messiah should do for His followers?

A strong wind was blowing. And it was not the wind that Jesus had talked about to Nicodemus not long before. This was not the unpredictable wind of the Holy Spirit that leads those who are born again in very unexpected ways. This was a wind that is contrary to that Spirit. This wind is full of the bitterness of resentment and doubt. And this wind is one that sets up the conditions for fear and darkness to proliferate.

But here is the really good news. Even though the wind was blowing harder and harder, and even though the people and the disciples had allowed this evil wind to infect all of their hearts and minds, stirring up a storm of discontent and bitterness, Jesus was still able to walk in peace even on that troubled sea.

Notice here what was taking place as Jesus walked on the turbulence of the sea. It says that He was drawing near to the boat. That phrase is no coincidence. Even in the midst of their confusion and indulgence in doubt and unbelief that opened them up to the attacks of the enemy both spiritually and physically, Jesus had not once taken His attention away from them. As the results of their discontent came to a climax and their fears for their very life eclipsed their resentment against Jesus, at that very moment Jesus was seen coming near to them. Though they had failed to dwell on His goodness and mercy or learn from Him the truths about God He had come to reveal, His mercy still continued steady as a rock. Where sin abounds grace much more abounds. (Romans 5:20)

I am finding myself in similar situations at times. Negative thinking plagues me like a sticky glue that is hard to shake off. Frustration with God's ways and timing tempt me to doubt His love for me. Lifelong habits of negative assumptions about motives and circumstances cause me to view things distortedly. At times I feel myself getting stirred up as a strong ill wind blows through my life. As a result, sometimes I find myself feeling fearful when I see Jesus approaching instead of hopeful.

But the good news in this story that I want to never forget is that no matter how violent the storm or how confused my emotions are because of distorted ideas of what God is like or what He should do, Jesus is still well able to walk on the turbulence of my seas. And though I may think He is a ghost or an omen of my soon demise, He is actually coming to bless me, to save me but also to challenge my false ideas about what God is like. His words to me just as He said to His disciples on that savage night long ago are the same. Do not be afraid; it is I – me, Jesus, your friend, your Savior, your protector.

How many times I have heard that voice in the middle of my storms. Don't be afraid!

Some years ago it finally began to dawn on me that my real problem was not the external circumstances that I thought needed to be dealt with in my life but the terror that they produced in my own heart. Fear itself is my greatest enemy, not the dangers that threaten to destroy my comfortable way of living. But until I am willing to face my fears head-on and give them over to Jesus, trusting in His heart to be with me through anything that might happen to me, I am not able to break the spell and darkness that those fears produce inside of my heart.

I want to learn to discern the presence of Jesus as He seeks to come to me on the turbulence of my own emotions and circumstances. I want to let go of my fears of Him along with the lies about His intentions and ways and to trust Him enough to even ask Him to invite me to walk on those same rough seas myself like Peter did. I want to have my own belief in Jesus much stronger so that my trust in Him will trump my logical analysis of the circumstances I find myself in. I want to know Jesus as it is my privilege to know Him, at a much deeper heart level.

Last night I listened to some training on the phone related to my business. The lady speaking really spoke to my own situation when she began talking about dealing with negative thought patterns. I have been realizing lately a little of how much these patterns of thinking infect my life and hamper my effectiveness. She said that until we face these things head-on and learn to dispense with them they will keep us from having the success in touching other lives that we want to have.

Her message really resonated with me. I realized again that God put me into this business to train me spiritually as well as to provide for me economically at this time. He is causing me to see a little more how my life-long habit of negative thinking poisons my heart and my relationships with everyone around me, even total strangers. It is becoming clear to me that something always seems to show up very quickly in my conversations with people that suddenly causes them to pull away and not trust me. I am sure that this negative basis of thinking is a very large part of this.

I want to see Jesus walking on these stirred up waters drawing near to me. And I want to welcome Him into my boat, not live in constant fear of Him because He appears different than what I expect Him to look like or act like. I want a different kind of wind to be the controlling factor in my sails. I want to be filled with His peace and to have my seas directed by His presence.

Father, this is my prayer today. I ask for Your Spirit be the wind in my life and to dispel the fear and darkness that comes from my desires that conflict with Your plans for my life. Give me Your perspective and fill me with Your peace and presence today throughout whatever comes my way, for Your name's sake.

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