Receiving What?

John answered and said, "A man can receive nothing unless it has been given him from heaven." (John 3:27)

I would like to look at this from John's perspective. What may have been in his mind when he said these words? What was it that he did or didn't receive relative to what his disciples were talking about?

His disciples were feeling disappointment and some jealousy over the fact that Jesus was starting to get more attention and more disciples than John at this point. After being baptized by John in the Jordan, instead of becoming one of John's disciples like many other people had done, Jesus disappeared for awhile and then when He reappeared, instead of hooking up with John it appeared that He had started up a competing ministry to draw people away from John. This is easily what it might have looked like to the loyal disciples of John the Baptist.

But John would not allow that kind of self-serving thinking infect his own spirit or ministry. He viewed himself in a totally different light and his job and role from a very different perspective than most others around him. He had spent his whole life preparing for this brief and intense work of cracking open the hard hearts of God's chosen people and creating an environment more conducive for the Messiah to have access to His people. It was very clear in John's mind that he himself was not the star here and never should be. Popularity was one of the greatest desires for him and he was keen to not allow it to neutralize his real destiny as a true friend of the Bridegroom.

John demonstrated a spirit and attitude that I need to learn far more deeply. He was living in passionate devotion to God and seeking to attract as many as possible to become hungry to know God through his messages and his example without getting them too closely attached to himself in the process. It is a tricky business to draw out another's affections without succumbing to the intense temptation to have those affections become a means of making one's self feel better and enjoying them for your own self-esteem. To awaken someone else's affections for the sole purpose of then pointing them to attach them to your best friend instead of yourself is the highest form of service and dedication that can be accomplished. That is the role of a true, loyal friend.

So what was it that John received from heaven that he was referring to here? All of his popularity, all of the apparent success in his ministry by the many people who were aroused and convicted in their hearts by his straight preaching, all of the attentions and affections awakened in the hearts of people all around him were all given to him by heaven. John was in the position of a broker of sorts, a broker who dealt in hearts and souls. He was entrusted with the confidence, affections and trust of thousands of people and what he chose to do with all those valuable assets would demonstrate what kind of character he really had inside.

The more I think about this the more I realize how unqualified I have been to do this kind of work. Repeatedly throughout my life I have at times drawn out someone's affections only to have it all blow up in my face and have them turn on me unexpectedly leaving me wondering what I did wrong. Because of my own lack of a father's blessing from childhood that should have imparted to me a strong sense of identity, value, worth and confidence, I have gravitated toward trying to find value and identity in what others think of me. I have been hungry for affections while at the same time unable to receive them from those who may have wanted to give it to me properly.

When I read the story of Jacob wrestling with the angel from heaven sent to give him the blessing he craved so deeply, I see myself in stark relief. I can easily identify with Jacob's intense feelings of emptiness and longing, fear and desire, passion and yet confusion. Instead of freely accepting the hug from God that the angel was sent to deliver to him, he found himself fighting all night long against the very thing that he longed for the most while not realizing what he was doing. In essence I perceive that what he was really fighting all night was not just a stranger in the night but he was really grappling with his own confused pictures of God, his own fears, his own longings and conflicting emotions that had blocked him all his life from being able to rest in the love of His God with peace.

John the Baptist had a very different story in his life. He demonstrated what it looks like to live with purpose and passion knowing who he was and living fully within the blessing of his father's – both his earthly father and his heavenly Father. He had bold confidence to stand against all odds, to face bitter opposition, scorn and hatred from those who opposed him without flinching because he kept ever before his heart the face of the One who gave him true value and identity.

It was because of this position of confidence in who he was and how valued and cherished he was by God that he could be a safe person to handle the hearts and affections of so many people and transfer their attention away from him toward the Messiah who had come to demonstrate the original Source of all love. John's ministry was destined to pale in contrast to the vivid presentation of the love, passion and goodness of God as revealed in the life of Jesus, God's representative on earth as a human. John was sent ahead of him to awaken interest and hunger and desire in people's hearts for something much better and more satisfying than the shallow religion that they were experiencing. John was sent to awaken and intensify this hunger and then to point everyone to the only One who could satisfy that hunger effectively with a love as big as eternity itself.

So again, what did John receive from heaven? He had received the hearts and affections of the thousands who had flocked to hear him and be baptized upon the conviction of their true empty condition. He had received popularity and notoriety in order to awaken as much attention as possible for Jesus to pick up the ball and carry it from here on. John was given the privileges of being the first to touch the hearts of many but not in order to bless his own heart with their attentions but to direct their affections to the real Lover who only could ravish their hearts and fill the deepest longings of their souls.

Then he said what I believe is a very important phrase in verse 29. He who has the bride is the Bridegroom. John was not the one who could love the bride of God – the people called to be loved by God – anything like God Himself could do. A friend of the bridegroom would become a betrayer if he began to flirt with the affections of the bride for his own pleasure and misuse his advantages and the trust that the potential bride began to place in him. His role was strictly to awaken interest in the potential bride for the Bridegroom and then to introduce her to the real truth about the one who wanted to marry her. The friend's job was to sweep away the lies in the potential bride's mind about the Suitor seeking to draw her to Himself. The friends role was to help correct her mental pictures of the potential Bridegroom so that she would more readily respond to His invitations to come closer and get better acquainted with His heart.

Heaven had given John the highest honor that it can impart – a friend of God who could be trusted with the delicate and powerful emotions and affections of others for the purpose of passing them on to another without exploiting them for his own pleasure or benefit. To do this John had to constantly be aware of his true role in all of this and keep clearly in his mind and heart what his true purpose was for living. He was to receive the hearts of people awakened by God for the purpose of then connecting those hearts with the very heart of God as revealed in the person of Jesus the Messiah. In doing so his reward in place of enjoying the affections and attentions of the bride directly was the joy that he would experience as he saw the deep bonds growing between those he had attracted to be the bride and the heart of his best friend, the very Son of God. This is what he says repeatedly in the rest of verse 29.

The friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly because of the bridegroom's voice. Therefore this joy of mine is fulfilled.

Learning to Receive

A man can receive nothing unless it has been given him from heaven. (John 3:27)

This looks to me like maybe it is one of those principles that govern reality that I come across every once in awhile. At first glance it looks rather simple and plain until one begins to compare various other verses and concepts with it. Then it begins to take on a much deeper significance.

One thing that comes to my attention is something I learned a few years ago. It was pointed out that the brain is designed in such a way that as it is maturing it needs to learn certain principles or concepts before it is ready to properly learn others. If someone is forced to learn certain lessons without first absorbing the prerequisite principles and lessons and internalizing them, the more advanced concepts may appear to be incorporated into the life but there will be important missing foundational pieces that cause internal weaknesses even though the externals may appear to be correct.

This verse reminds me of just such a situation. It is the duty of an infant to first learn to receive everything with joy. This is far more important than most people realize, particularly in the Christian community because of our strong emphasis on unselfishness and giving to others. This sets us up to try to rush young children into lessons of giving and sharing sometimes too quickly because we don't understand the importance of first making sure they have learned the foundational principle of receiving gladly and experiencing joy with those around them.

When a person is pushed too early to give selflessly before they learn to receive with joy it forces them to start learning hypocrisy. Christian children are very often trained emphatically to give and share but more from a sense of duty instead of from a basis of joy and satisfaction. When this is done what is produced are adults who may be apparently generous, who faithfully support the church and missions and who are eager to pressure others to do the same. But too often these people who appear generous on the outside are motivated more from a sense of trying to avoid guilt or condemnation or shame than they are from a sense of fullness and joy and resting in the blessings and presence of a loving Father.

A person who has failed to learn to first receive with joy will find it difficult at best to give with joy and with cheerfulness. They may try to appear cheerful while giving but even this is from a sense of duty and obligation more than from a genuine gladness that springs spontaneously from the heart. I am one of those people and it was not until I learned this truth a few years ago that I could begin to understand what my real problem was. When this became more clear to me I began to see very clearly my inability to receive with joy and experience peace whenever someone wanted to bless me or affirm me or compliment me.

The symptoms of this dysfunction are seen often in my struggle to know how to relate to compliments from others. I have struggled with this in various ways for all of my life. I evidently had a catastrophic failure very early on learning to receive with joy and I certainly can remember the many times I was pressured to pretend appreciation for gifts received. This forced me to demonstrate appreciation on strictly a superficial level without any regard for being truthful about what my heart was feeling. The same thing went for dealing with offenses. I was repeatedly forced to say “I'm sorry” without any genuine heart condition to support that claim. Appearances were far more important in my culture than any attention paid to the real condition of the heart. Thus I learned to conform on the outside while trying very hard to suppress any conflicting feelings and frustrations that continued to increase on the inside.

Because I still have a gap in that area of my character foundation I continue to find it difficult to both receive and to give without resistance. Maybe that is why I find this text so compelling to me. Instead of focusing on giving which is the more advanced lesson of maturity, John here spells out very clearly that everything we receive comes from God. It is so important to have this view of reality clear in our minds. Everything proceeds from God – all life, all matter, everything that exists is created and sustained by the power of His word.

Immediately we begin to wonder about all the bad things that come to us and how that fits into this principle. The problem is not that God sends bad things our way but that the good things sent by Him in our direction get twisted, perverted distorted and hijacked by sin and sinners before they reach us. Sin has wreaked havoc in God's universe and salvation is the grand plan to repair and restore us from all of this damage. This includes the repairs needed to rectify the dysfunction of trying to give without first learning to receive with joy.

As I think about this more thoroughly I realize that one reason I have a hard time receiving with joy is that it was early on improperly linked to selfishness in my thinking. It became connected inside my mind that to receive anything nice, especially compliments was considered self-indulgence and was at least a little sinful. Over time this resulted in a feeling of guilt and condemnation each time I was the recipient of a compliment and I felt compelled to discount that compliment or affirmation to avoid the internal discomfort and guilt that would surely result if I accepted it freely.

This of course had the effect of dampening anyone's desire to offer me good things since I was so unappreciative. The result was that I lived largely in isolation feeling discouraged in my attempts to offer my talents and gifts to others since I could not receive anything positive in return. This pattern of thinking now seems to me to be clearly designed in the mind of the prince of hell himself. All of Satan's schemes are designed to diminish life and happiness and joy and to slowly destroy God's image in our hearts.

I believe that as I learn the remedial lessons of how to receive with grace and with joy that I will then be more free to move on to being much more able to give with cheerfulness and joy as well. Instead of discounting what others do for me or diminishing their compliments I will be able to engage and encourage them in acknowledging the privileges God has given me to share with them.

As I learn to live life receiving everything as from heaven and trusting my heavenly Father to work all things together for good even when they initially may be very bad, I believe that I will better be able to give without grudging. I feel I need to learn these lessons soon so that I can get unstuck in this area of my dwarfed maturity. It will likely have dramatic effects on all my relationships as well as my outlook on life. But I have to rest in God's plans for my rehabilitation and cooperate with His methods.

A man can receive nothing unless it has been given him from heaven. And that even includes my own healing.