Sharing Reproach with Joy

Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification. For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, "the reproaches of those who reproached You fell on me." (Romans 15:2-3)

I have become estranged from my brothers And an alien to my mother's sons. For zeal for Your house has consumed me, And the reproaches of those who reproach You have fallen on me. (Psalms 69:8-9)

As I meditate on these verses and the context of the quotation in Psalms that was a prophecy of the experience of Jesus, a number of things are starting to come to my attention. The chapter in Psalms from which this quote was taken has a lot of very interesting implications about proper perspective on relationships to God and to those around us. It also reveals a great deal of honesty about feelings, frustration, shame and a number of other feelings. It tells me the importance of being honest with God about my true feelings instead of trying to pretend that I am not hurting while attempting to put on a religious facade.

But in the specific area of that chapter from which this quote was lifted I see another dynamic. The more that I identify with the real truth about God the more out of sync I will find myself with the world that refuses to accept the truth about God. As a result I will often find myself the object of scorn, reproach and shame for the very things that increasingly are becoming important to my heart. The closer I get to God's heart, and particularly the more I am filled with the passion that is the very essence of His heart the more I will encounter shame and reproach from maybe even my closest relatives, from anyone who is resisting the heart transformation that God wants to accomplish in their lives.

Given this background it almost seems a little out of context to apply this phrase in the place that Paul uses it in this passage. But that only alerts me that there is very likely something even more profound here that I am not yet seeing clearly. God, open my understanding and show me Your amazing ways from Your Word.

The connections or roots for what Paul is saying here extend quite a ways back through this passage in Romans. It is directly linked to the whole last chapter dealing with my need to accept those who are at a different place in their walk with God without judging them. It means treating them with love like the brothers and sisters that they truly are to me, even when they may not act in ways that elicit feelings of love and affection. It involves getting my focus shifted from the externals and disputes about differences over doctrinal variations to supporting them at the heart level while being very careful not to be a source of discouragement to them. This involves pursuing the things which make for peace and the building up of one another.

While I am not instructed to adopt their views on beliefs that they may be confused about or are mistaken about through unreleased fears or lack of knowledge, I am to treat them with the gentleness and kindness of Jesus in all sincerity and compassion. I am to be filled with the Spirit of service just as Jesus was who told His disciples clearly that He did not come to be served but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many. (Matthew 20:28 and Mark 10:45)

So where is this reproach coming from that is referred to here? The first time Paul goes through this instruction he says we should please others more than ourselves. But when He refers to the example of Jesus he changes the sequence and replaces the pleasing others part with this reference to reproach. Just what does that really mean?

Notice the difference between the two here.

We who are strong ought not to... please ourselves.

Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification.

Christ did not please Himself...

the reproaches of those who reproached You fell on me.

My mind struggles to figure out just who or where this reproach is coming from or is originally directed toward. Is it reproach aimed at the fellow believers who are weak in faith? Is that part of how we are to bear their weaknesses – by joining them in the reproach they are receiving for the choices they make even though we may not necessarily agree with those choices ourselves? Wow! That takes on a whole new dimension now.

On the other hand, from the context in Psalms the reproach seems to be coming from unbelievers and originally directed toward God. Then the Psalmist along, with Jesus who is the object of this prophecy are experiencing the reproach by their identification with God.

Ah, now it is starting to become more clear to me. The common thread between the references in Psalms and Romans is the willingness to identity ourselves with someone who is receiving reproach from others and thereby putting ourselves in the line of fire along with them. In Psalms it is identifying so closely with God's passion and perspective that those who despise and reproach God will add us to their target list. In Romans Paul is saying that we should be willing to do the same thing even for people we don't agree with theologically but are still part of God's family here on earth. They may be someone we consider weak in faith and maybe even confused in some of their theology, but nonetheless we are instructed to so identify ourselves with them that we come under the same reproach and shame that unbelievers are directing toward them.

This really does parallel the example of Jesus as Paul suggests here. Jesus never adopted any of our crazy, confused ideas about reality or God that all of us circulate and hold in our blindness. But nevertheless He identified with us so thoroughly that all of the shame and scorn and reproach directed toward God and followers of God were experienced in full within His own heart. He felt every pain no matter how large or small that any of us have ever experienced and He felt it in full force. By doing so He joined us right where we are emotionally so as to mentor and show us how to return to joy and peace.

One of the most important principles of the brain is the fact that the maturity process involves learning how to return to a sense of rest and peace from any negative emotion. It has been observed that there are six basic negative emotions that are common to all people and that it is very important for mental health to very early on learn how to recover quickly from each one of these negative emotions if we are to grow and mature in life. But the only really effective way that our brain can learn to recover from any of these emotions is to track a more mature mind who is willing to join them in that emotion and then by example demonstrate how to get back to joy and peace together.

Given that principle of the mind I can see how it applies directly to both of these passages. According to the brain's neurological definition, joy is the experience I feel when someone is genuinely glad to be with me, when I am very important to their heart and I am considered very special to them. So when someone is willing to join me in my distress without first waiting for me to synchronize with their perspective and beliefs; when they are willing to enter into my emotions with me while at the same time being able to perceive things from a more mature perspective and then gently lead me back to a state of inner rest, peace and joy with others, that is the essence of what is described here in this passage and is the main focus of the heart of Jesus for each one of us.

So if I am to follow the example of what Jesus was willing to do for me and continues to do, then I will begin to reflect His heart of compassion for those who are weaker than me in faith just as I am weaker in faith than Jesus. It only makes sense that if we are to follow the example of Jesus – which is what the word Christian really means – then we must align ourselves with fellow believers in the same way that Jesus has aligned Himself with us. His willingness to identify Himself with our pain, shame and reproach and show us a way back to joy is the path that I need to follow in my relationship to those He has put into my life that are different and that even seem quite unlovable at times.

God, thank-you for this lesson in sharing joy with some whom I would not normally think of sharing it with. Please remind me and make me more intensely aware of how much Jesus identifies with me and gives me joy in the process so that I can be empowered to do the same for others through the enabling of Your Spirit. Make me a source of joy and a companion in recovery from negative feelings for others who may be stuck in their immaturity and in need of a lift. Teach me how to be Your assistant in bearing the weaknesses of my brothers and sisters in the body of Christ. Father, according to Your Word, I ask You to write this law, this principle of Your character into my heart today.

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Edification with Passion

Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification. (Romans 15:2)

As I let the real meaning of each of these words sink in, both from the English and from the Greek, I sense a connection to a truth that has been emerging into my attention for some time. That is, the need for every single true follower of God to become filled and transformed by the passion that throbs in the very heart of the Godhead.

I see allusion to this passion in the original word for please. It involves emotion and an exciting of the emotions. So much religion is devoid of any emotion (except boredom if that can be considered an emotion) that it fails to ignite the affections of the heart toward God or attract others to Him. I have seen great emphasis on the need for us to love God, but in reality this is completely impossible until we begin to feel a sense of how passionately God loves us. Love can only be awakened by first being loved. We have no real love inherent within ourselves any more than a mirror has light inherent within itself.

What I have observed over the years is that one of two things tend to develop in reaction to the insistence that we must love God in order to be saved. Either a person will tend to redefine and remold the definitions of the words to fit what is already taking place in their experience and thus create a massive collection of altered vocabularies that sound right religiously, or else they will move toward an emotionally based religion that revolves around arousing feelings and excitement and emotional highs that come from all kinds of man-made sources but have little to do with the real spirit of God. These too, will tend to form their own set of definitions for all their religious words and will believe that the emotions they feel from their music or their interactions with other people or even their glossolalia is the kind of love required for them to be saved.

I believe that it is quite true that we must have love for God in our hearts in order to be safe to save in heaven. However, it needs to become much more clear to us that it is absolutely absurd to focus on our need for love without focusing even more on the real truth about God and His true feelings for us. If our concepts of God are confused with fear, are based on lies from the enemy of God and give us mixed messages about real love, then as mirrors, our souls will equally reflect confusion about God to others and we will still be living in spiritual Babylon as described in the book of Revelation. For the word Babylon means confusion and confusion is certainly one of the best descriptions of the religious atmosphere in this world today.

What I am seeing in this verse is a call to return to the true model of spirituality that will produce and bond together the true body of Christ here on earth. That is going to take shape when each and every person individually and personally makes the decision that they are going to reflect the example of Jesus and put others ahead of themselves. Each person will make a conscious and continuing choice through a vital and intimate connection with the heart of God to become a channel of God's passion and a source of real blessing for the purpose of integrating others into the edifice (hence the edification) of the temple of God. And the essence of the mortar that holds this edifice together is the strongest adhesive known anywhere in the universe, the bond of joy and love.

Any other model or activity outside of this basic formula will sooner or later be found to be a counterfeit and a fraud. Any other relationship or doctrine if not in complete harmony with this purpose will contradict it and must be exposed and reformed according to the standard of true religion.

Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world. (James 1:27)

"By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." (John 13:35)

Real love may indeed be a principle, but it cannot be real and effective unless it can also awaken our emotions. For our heart is the source of the emotions God designed us to experience and if we claim to have love but never have our emotions engaged then it is likely that our claim of love is only a head-trip based on an intellectual religion, a profession that has not been embraced by our heart.

Likewise, if our professed love is based only on the good feelings we get when we participate in an exciting worship experience but likewise has not transformed our heart and mind with the solid principles of the laws of God (which are the principles of true reality), then our professed love will have no backbone, no stability under pressure and our religion will be as fickle as our feelings.

True love can only be reflected by being loved, and that can only happen when we become truly exposed to and get a taste for the reality of the passion of God's love for us. That is what I want for myself. I want to become obsessed with knowing the heart of God and being sucked into the fire of His passion so thoroughly that I will not be able to prevent myself from passionately serving others with a spirit that is transformed and energized by the Spirit that powers all of heaven.

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The Perfect Builder

Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification. (Romans 15:2)

Yesterday I saw from the original language that this word please means to lift up, to excite the emotions in a way that builds up, to sail away emotionally. Today as I look at the next verse I see the picture taking even more definite shape. In the kingdom of heaven everyone lives to serve others before themselves. This is not because they have to do that in order to be part of God's family but rather it is because living from the heart will cause one to spontaneously live that way. To live in selfishness is to strangle and stifle the creativity and joy that our heart was created to express.

When God originally designed us, it was to perfectly live and thrive in the energizing atmosphere that will always be found in His authentic family which is His kingdom. That is how our brains and hearts are designed. Obviously a lot of damage has taken place that has terribly distorted our original design and caused a great deal of malfunctions to happen. But that does not detract from the fact that we are still equipped with minds and hearts designed for God's way of thinking and living even though it may seem largely foreign to us right now.

Salvation is really the provision of God to retrain our hearts, rewire our circuits, reeducate our minds and restore us to our original purpose and design which is to reflect His ways of thinking and feeling and be synchronized with Him. This is made even more clear in the demonstration of what God is like in the life of Jesus talked about in the next verse. Jesus came in part to show us by tangible example in human form how God feels about us and wants to relate to us. As our example, as the exhibit of the original pattern from which we have been seriously damaged, His life is a safe source that we can contemplate for our hearts to imitate.

Having a somewhat simple mind and not having much organized “higher” education according to the measurements of the world, I have found it very helpful over the past few years to question any word that raises a question in my mind. I often discover that there are rich meanings hidden within the context and the original language that I had no idea even existed if I only assume I know what a word means. So I looked up this word edification to find out what in the world the purpose is for pleasing my neighbor.

What I found reminds me very strongly of what Paul had spent some time on back in chapter twelve.

For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. (Romans 12:4-5)

This word edification is directly linked to our word for edifice or a building designed for people to inhabit. When put that way this all starts to make a lot more sense. In recent years I have been alerted to a running theme throughout Scriptures that revolves around this concept of a building or dwelling place. And what I have noticed is that God is in the business of forming a living edifice composed of all who are willing to be incorporated into it, to create a dwelling place for God Himself to live in in a very intimate way. This all comes to an unimaginably wonderful grand climax in Revelation where at the very end of the story of the great war between good and evil the Father God Himself comes to take up residence in this dwelling place that has been prepared for Him in His people. (see Revelation 21:3)

With that background for context it creates a lot more excitement and incentive for me to pay attention and grasp the real implications of these instructions for me here in these verses. I can begin to view these words from a positive perspective instead of simply demands that I suppress my selfishness for the good of others. To have the proper context from the much bigger picture suddenly can transform the details dramatically and give them a whole new light and dimension.

The real purpose of God, the reason God wants me to lift up, build up, encourage, help support spiritually and emotionally my neighbor is so that God's dwelling place, His body on earth, can be prepared in order for Him to feel comfortable living among and in us. If I am willing to obey His request and instructions that I see here I will find myself coming into sympathy and harmony with the very same work that Jesus did while among men and women during His time on earth. And in the process of lifting others up the bonds of love and joy that are essential for adhering the body together effectively will form more strongly between my heart and the hearts of those I seek to strengthen and lift up as well as the heart of Jesus.

For me personally I can see that God is showing me these things right on time. He has been convicting me for quite some time about changing my relationship and attitudes toward the people in the local church to better reflect how Jesus feels about them. I have been taking small steps to dissolve some of the tension and suspicion that has affected their feelings about me and recently they asked me to teach a lesson in church sometime soon. I realize that very possibly in their minds they want to observe in this situation if I am safe to trust in their midst or if I will demonstrate some of the confrontational, disruptive attitudes so often indulged in by my late father in this same church.

As I pondered on this passage this morning I sensed God telling me that I need to pay close attention to the real meaning and implications of these verses in all of my dealings with these people for His reputation's sake. According to these verses it is my job to be patient and sensitive to their weaknesses and mistaken ideas about God, to guard my own spirit and be much more filled with the gentleness and kindness of Jesus in my dealings with them. Instead of just focusing on my own spiritual growth and relishing the freedoms that I am beginning to appreciate in my growing understanding of the real truth about God, I am to be careful not to overwhelm them with what I believe is advanced perspective but to see them through God's eyes and to love and care for them as those who indeed may be weaker but no less important than I am.

I am beginning to perceive that my real purpose should be to help them begin to see their own true identity from God's perspective instead of the mistaken notions they have about themselves and about religion. But this has to be done very gently and under the strict guidance of the Holy Spirit. It is far too easy for me to want to rush in and try to change people's minds too quickly before the Spirit has prepared them for certain changes. Spiritual growth is all about maturing. And like a beautiful rose slowly unfolding its petals, I have to respect the work and timing of God in other people's lives or I can easily damage the buds that are beginning to show promise of future blossoms.

My job is to assist God in any way He shows me – both in spirit, in words and in actions – the work of Jesus in forming His dwelling place made up of each one of us who are willing to be built into it for His pleasure. I am to assist God with the building of His temple by cooperating with His methods that are usually starkly different than my natural impulses. I want to be a good apprentice under the training of the perfect Craftsman who is in charge of building the true new temple for God to live in. As an apprentice I need to watch how He does things, the spirit and techniques He uses, the subtle “tricks of the trade” that makes things go so smoothly when He does them, the extreme attention to little details that He never fails to notice. Yes, I want to be mentored by the perfect Carpenter.

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Bearing the Burdens

Now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves. (Romans 15:1)

I looked up some of the Greek words in this verse to see what I might find to help me understand this better and I found something rather interesting. The word used for bear means to lift up, remove, sustain, take up. What is interesting is that the word used for please has a somewhat similar meaning. It conveys the idea of lifting up our emotions, to be agreeable, to sail away emotionally.

I also noticed that the very same word is used to describe the person who is weak here as was used in verse one of the previous chapter. In reality there is no break in the continuation of thought like that artificially created by this chapter break which is often the case. Paul is still directly addressing the issue of our attitudes and relationship to those in the body of Christ who are at a different level emotionally in their relationship with God than we are.

In contrast to the judgment and contempt that we are warned against indulging in in the previous chapter, here we are told what the alternative should be. Along with accepting them (14:1) we are to give them preference with our emotional strength over pleasing ourselves. Instead of indulging in the legitimate freedoms that cause our own feelings to be excited and feel more free, when we are in the presence of those who are offended and hurt by our choices because of their own immaturity in faith, we should be considerate, gentle and kind in our thoughtfulness for their sensitivities and fears.

This reminds me of a medical analogy that might fit well here. Normally in our physical contact with those around us we might not think much of holding a person's hand or arm or laying our hand on their shoulder in a gesture of affection. But if that person has experienced serious burns and their skin is raw and extremely sensitive it would be the height of inconsideration to touch or grab them in ways that otherwise we might not think anything of. To do so would induce extreme pain and even sometimes cause worse damage than what they had already experienced. Instead we must learn how to treat them with the utmost gentleness, not because they are a bad person or have some character flaw but because they are in a very vulnerable state and need time for healing.

It only makes sense that when dealing with a person who has experienced serious burns on their body we should treat them with the utmost care and sensitivity. But part of the reason for doing so is not just to avoid creating unnecessary further trauma but to assist them toward recovery so that they can once again enjoy the comfort and excitement of being touched and held by those who love them after they are healed.

So too, we should see the person who is weak in faith not as someone who is inferior to us or who is wrong and needs stern correction but someone who has been burned by the effects of sin and is very sensitive in ways that we may not be. This does not make them any less a child of God or an inferior part of the body of Christ. It makes them a sibling in need of careful attention and extra consideration with an eye to helping them heal and be recovered to a condition of more health and joy.

If we would view people who are weak in faith, not as targets to re-shape or coerce into reflecting our own opinions or to convince of our personal ideas and convictions, but people who are potential close friends who right now are suffering from emotional burns and are in need of delicate care until the healing process is more complete; if we would choose to look at them through God's eyes in this way it might be far easier to be patient and kind with them and to look forward to what they will look like when they are healed more fully.

This verse is actually highlighting the core problem of sin in the hearts of each one of us. When I choose to prefer my own spiritual and emotional pleasure and excitement above the need for me to consider the effects of my actions on someone who is hypersensitive and “burned” about that issue, then I am really indulging my selfishness and pride at their expense instead of being led by God's Spirit of gentleness and kindness.

Remember, it is the kindness of God that leads us to repentance (2:4). And if I allow that kind, gentle, patient Spirit to be seen in my relationship to a person who is over-sensitive right now with a view to helping them move toward a more confident relationship with Jesus in their own heart, then I might be able to become a channel of the kindness of God toward them that will draw them to repentance, to more release of their unfounded fears and I can be a source of joy (being willing to be happy to be with them in their immature state) for them. As I help increase their joy capacity by my willingness to accept them in their fears and gently show them how to return to a state of joy themselves from whatever is frightening them in the present, then we will become bonded more closely in our hearts both to each other and to the heart of Jesus.

What I see in this verse is that as a follower of Jesus I need to learn to imitate His example of extreme sensitivity and gentleness with all of us. As I consider the implications of this verse I realize how much I need others to be obedient to these instructions in their dealings with me. I know that there are areas of my belief or emotions where I long to experience more freedom and joy but am still bound by chains of tradition and inhibition. Those who know me very well (I'm not sure who that might be) will recognize that there are things that might bother me but at the same time that I long to be more free to enjoy. Instead of being forced into those things I need to be gently eased into facing my fears and to have someone join me in that exercise with great sensitivity to my raw emotions and fears. Gentleness is far more powerful than we might imagine and gentleness is a sign of true greatness.

Behold, My Servant, whom I uphold; My chosen one in whom My soul delights. I have put My Spirit upon Him; He will bring forth justice to the nations. He will not cry out or raise His voice, nor make His voice heard in the street. A bruised reed He will not break and a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish; He will faithfully bring forth justice. (Isaiah 42:1-3)

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